Lucille “Big Mama” Allen, a beacon of wisdom and faith in her family, has left behind a profound statement echoing her guidance through life’s complexities. For me, and a vast audience of 235 relatives spanning generations, Big Mama’s words have been a compass steering life’s decisions long after her transition to the spiritual realm.
“Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth” is an old adage that means we should be grateful when we receive a gift, rather than scrutinizing it for flaws. This wisdom is particularly poignant in today’s society, where gratitude can be a transformative force. For example, in the context of social justice in the USA, accepting the unexpected support of allies in the Black Lives Matter movement, or the significant progress made through community-led initiatives like food drives during the COVID-19 pandemic, exemplifies the power of embracing gifts and opportunities that come our way.
In 1999, when I was tasked with organizing a Father’s Day cookout, I did not initially view it as a gift. The responsibility seemed overwhelming, and I promised myself I would never do it again. Mobilizing BIPOC men to give up their Father’s Day to cook for others was a daunting task, and engaging charities and sponsors was equally challenging.
However, 25 years later, City Men Cook has become a tradition, the largest and longest-running national Father’s Day celebration of its kind in North Texas.
City Men Cook has reinvented hope & community . We have reunited hundreds of Black men with their families, positively changed the way Black men are viewed in our community, and most importantly, impacted the health of thousands of Black men with mandatory health screenings.
This initiative has shifted our focus from reacting to health issues to creating opportunities for recovery through early detection.
Personally, this journey led to the early detection of my cancer. Because of City Men Cook, my cancer was discovered early, giving me hope and a chance for a cure and a quality of life makeover. Most importantly, I share my diagnosis as a tool of awareness for Black Males in the Diaspora to screen and engage Healthy Dialogue.
In summary, I will never look a gift horse in the mouth unless I am looking for the underlying gift God has assigned to me.
Big Mama’s wisdom continues to guide us, reminding us to find the blessings in every responsibility and opportunity that comes our way.
Don’t email me this time, go to www.citymencook.com and join the movement.
Terry Allen is an NABJ award- winning Journalist, DEI expert, PR professional and founder of the charity – Vice President at FocusPR, Founder of City Men Cook and Dallas Chapter President of NBPRS.org
