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Lucille “Big Mama” Allen’s birth in 1906 sparked an imprint that created a lesson for a life-time. Her lesson empowered all of her influencers she encountered. Her influencers included, but limited to, her three sons and three daughters, 16 grandchildren, 50 great-grandchildren, 38 great-great-grandchildren, seven great-great-great-grandchildren and a host of nieces, nephews and a multitude of ‘Bonus” family members. I mention her “bonus” family members because Big Mama always took in individuals that were not blood related to any of us yet they were treated as family and like family. Herein lies today’s lesson, “Don’t make a bed you do not want to lie in.”

Big Mama meant an unmade bed that looks like an unfinished lumpy landscape that speaks to personal avoidance, procrastinating denial and creating a bad brand with an undesirable image of unchanged sheets. This is not a place for anyone to lay in again at all! Is this the bed you want to make or to Lie in?

Lucille “Big Mama” Allen wanted us to know that no matter what, if you chose to make the bed you make, you must lie in it! Another intent is, if “Big Mama “says that you have made your bed and must, you must lie in it. She is saying that since you have chosen to do a particular thing, you must now accept the unpleasant results of your action.

What saved me, is that Big Mama’s bed making lesson taught me how to make decisions.

Her play book said,

  1. Outline and list all the information on the decision you have to make BEFORE you decide.
  2. Eliminate all ideas, suggestions
    and thoughts that create polarization that marginalizes other humans.
  3. Deeply explore all factors that making the best decisions and diminishing bad choices

We as citizens and influencers are now in the midst of making decisions and adding our responses to the landscape. We must not leave our bed unkept and unmade, as it will have consequences.

  1. We need to show our democracy is not unraveling and deliver justice to the January 6 disruptors at the top, not just on the front line.
  2. We must be certain that we are protecting our borders at the same time ensuring humane treatment for all BIPOC people.
  3. We must peel back the layers to show the atrocities of the opposition in the Ukraine war, and stop standing by on shallow diplomacy excusing no-action.

I hope that we as a voting American public and world leader influencers will make a decision that says “I made this bed because it is where I want to lie as a human, as a citizen and as a world participant!”

Thanks, Big Mama.

Did you make a good bed, let me know at

Terry Allen is an NABJ award-winning Journalist, PR professional and founder of 1016 Media, the charity

  • City Men Cook and Dallas Chapter President of NBPRS-DFW
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Written By

Terry Allen is an award-winning media professional, journalist, and entrepreneur. He is also the founder of City Men Cook and 1016 Media. Reach him at


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