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ASK ALMA: You’re on the wrong train

By Alma Gill

Dear Alma,

I’m 25 and getting ready to marry a wonderfully fantastic man. We are totally compatible and get along in every way. Our sex life is amazing, and I really love him. However, I recently met a new man to whom I am unbelievably attracted, but just physically. I know deep inside that I want to be with my fiancé forever. My question to you is: Would it be so wrong to have sex with my new friend just one time? So far we’ve only gone to lunch and out for drinks. I see this as my last chance to hook up before I say “I do.”

Vonda M., Wheeling, W.V.

Honey Chile, please.

This is easy. All you want is for me to tell you, “Sure, girl, go on and get your swerve on before your wedding night.”

NOT! Keep it moving, sister, cause you won’t find that train on the Ask Alma railroad tracks of life. Of all the things you could have on your mind before your wedding, you’re daydreaming about another man. Really!?

Let me school you for a minute. Take a bus to Fantasy Land. That way you’ll have your moment of satisfaction (just not for real) and you won’t hurt your new husband or yourself by making the worst mistake of your life. What if you do it and you don’t have a good time.

Then, you’d be mad you put yourself out like that. What if you do it and you like it? Then you’ll want more, and you couldn’t because you’d be married.

Back up, take a chill pill and remind yourself of the morals that I’m sure are somewhere within your reach. You’ve found a great fiancé, and you want a quickie before you march down the aisle. You’ve made that perfectly clear.

However, my brain is on pause and I just have to say – the real question here should be: Are you sure you’re even ready to get married?

That Train Don’t Run on the Ask Alma Railroad


Alma Gill’s newsroom experience spans more than 25 years, including various roles at USA Today, Newsday and the Washington Post. Email questions to: Follow her on Facebook at “Ask Alma” and twitter @almaaskalma

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